Thursday, October 18, 2007

A 17-year old recluse.

Solitudinarian Mephistophelian.

That's some word that describes me true.A confounded 17 year old emaciated adolescent. Life, to her, is next to nix. She knows how to dissipate it...worthlessly. But since ever, in her heart, she knows... she's been a saphead.She was a prenominal scholar....once....unsurpassed....with an avidness to reach the zenith.She had this requisite detest for masses which tried to adjudicate her solemn travail to work...hard and harder!~

After my first few lines are well imprinted, in the minds of anyone who reads them, as a joke, I shall commence with all the other abstract things I have to say.

I was and am a genuine girl.I wont blout about saying "im popular among guys" but i hate myself when i am being discussed among a group of pathetic losers.Most of the guys i met or meet....are hapless!The others...are good....just good...so they're my friends.When i meet a guy..the first feeling is so warm that it doesnt even lemme think about him like the other way...at that point of time i'd rather want him to be my friend...the maximum.

But yes. I love. I do love. And love more. I think it keeps me alive. I don’t know what sort of love I’m talking about. Not specifically the family love, the parental love, the brotherly or the sisterly love, the spiritual love, not even the funny infatuated teenage love. I guess i live love. Why? Sometimes when you don’t know the meaning you move towards an answer and patiently wait for it to take form.But for all rest things..I hate.


U surely might think that im superficial.Most of them do.Just because i dont talk much they think im fake.Im some haughty pimp..an attention seeker..the biggest confession i have ever made is that i live a dual life...yes i do...and im so much happy with it that i dont want it to change..ever...nor wud i want mingling up of things.. Because both the cosmos's are true...factual in every damn sense...The latter part that is vulnerable to most of the people is less liked though....BY ME.

Recalling that extra-studious nerd, her life changed only when she topped her tenth board examination. She retrieves the casualties involved in the process and finds there were many. She used to plunge into that 20x18 cream walled room for hours and hours deeply dissolved in her books.

She knew nothing...of guys, of parties, of fun, of sluts, of beaches, of moonlight, of candles, of obssession,of money,of sarcasm,of wit,of ecstasy,of rain,of the orchids....She knew about books.Mention her a line...She'd tell you the page number: She'd answer any social study question....but couldnt answer life.

Her life then changed. Totally. One single day, and she was never the same girl. The tenth board results were out. Her prayers were answered! She had excelled. Happy.

Life..as one knows it! It took her to a well-known; rather elite school of the city, not to forget a girls one. She had been neural and affright and what not! As i remind myself...the day proved to be the best one of her life! She met 7 sorcerours. And Bingo! She knew what life was...

Not even Zeus can put into words what her life was for the next one year! She flunked her eleventh with no regrets. She'd changed. She knew what it was to have fun. That there were better things in life than becoming a geek. She had her priorities changed. Her whisms endured. She knew the meaning of friends. And school.

An incident and everything changed! Her world changed. Again. Yet again. To this damn day she doesnt know whom to blame. She does that to herself. She had not acted wisely...bleh! Wisely is such a big word! She had acted ludicrous. Nonsensical. Preposterous. Inane. The World's most wanted loser!:)

She's been fighting. Ever since. I think it's vindicated myself. Because life gives and takes. She took her friends and gave her love. A man who helped her out to survive and face the world again. A man she can never forget. Never in her life and aboard. God had been merciful! Generous. A man who made her rethink what her mother was to her and who made her resolve out of attaint and trauma both!

So far...she feels her life has been colourful...! Some shades of blue and a lot of pink. Even if she loses everything, she knows she'd gain emptiness. She knows the value of having a human life! Laughter, cry, joys, sorrows, trust, pain...she knows what all of it actually means and enjoys having the same!

A thought... to people who find life difficult, and think they are miserable... revive some of the moments of your life...moments that cease to non-exist. People who've been angelic to you...even if they've turned dogs now...there was a point of time you loved life, and trust a dying man, there will come another!

:)

1 comment:

sub said...

surbhi says:
main toh flat hun iski writin skillz pe
surbhi says:
man shez amazin
[c=4]Pavni[/c] says:
i know...phadu
[c=4]Pavni[/c] says:
mast likha hai
[c=4]Pavni[/c] says:
kewl yr...
DIS IZ MSN TOK GOIN ON......
N V BTH THINK YU R STUPENDOUS....
KUDOZ 2 YU....